This is college we’re talking about.
(See top of the page).
So it is without question that Theon Greyjoy was once a party animal. And what better place for a party animal than USC, itself? After all, the University of Southern California IS a party in it of itself. Forming the backbone of the party scene, the USC frat parties are the predominant driving force of the entire university. Thursday nights are in general, their wildest nights of the week, with anywhere from 5-10 houses throwing the biggest parties in Southern California. But in every fraternity, there is always one house that makes a huge mistake of accepting that one person who – in the long-run – is just a total douchbag. This douchbag, would be Theon Greyjoy. Sure he starts off nice. I mean, when Bran is taken prisoner by the wildlings in the forest near Winterfell, Theon saves him by shooting the wildling leader. Good for him! What are the chances that HE is the person who'd you least expect to be downright awful? Sure, Theon is just a product of a hostage after his homeland of the Iron Islands tried to rebel against Robert Baratheon and Eddard Stark. But I mean, Eddard did a nice thing of making Theon is ward . . . even though, yeah he was kind of still a hostage. But he has always been treated so kindly by the Stark family. They were basically his family, and he and Robb Stark became best buds! Theon did seem to have a relatively normal background as he grew up with the Starks. He was always good enough to hold a conversation, and on the surface, appear to be "just another dude on campus." Until, you know, he suddenly stabs you in the back. And once you have realized that Theon here has betrayed you and your (fraternity) house, you now suddenly recall that Theon did have a slight obsession with that "Rise of an Empire" class of his. But to be fair, you really didn't think nothing of his strange fascination with age-old empires. You just honestly thought that he was a nerd and not some kind of Benedict Arnold. But in the end, he got what he deserved. I guess now for next year's Halloween party, Theon can finally dress up as Justin Timberlake. Why? Because his dick is in a box.
Princeton is TOTALLY accurate for Joffrey.
So we can all agree that Joffrey Baratheon (aka, Lannister) is a bastard in more ways than one. Look at that smug little face of his! It's enough to make us want to bitch-slap him. But Tyrion Lannister already did that for us. Thank YOU Tyrion! In any event, Bitch-King here is far more than spoiled. Saying that he's entitled, loathsome, or insufferable, doesn't even cover it. Oh no, he is so much worse than that. He is cruel, sadistic and cowardly. Kind of like the academic system at Princeton. Grated, even though Princeton doesn't resonate THAT extreme to Joffrey's inhuman actions, the college has a way to get under your skin. For starters, the grade-deflation system is a pain in the ass for many Princeton students (like Joffrey). And even when you thought that getting into Princeton was the hardest part, the biggest challenge when you actually arrive to Princeton is competing with the other people who got into Princeton. Once you're in Princeton, you're still competing to be part of certain clubs and spots teams. God, its like competing to become the Hand of the King! So even though Joffrey is King and feels like he is on top of the world, there are plenty of downsides to his reign. The biggest one in particular is the fact that nothing is what it appears to be. Yes, Joffrey does have the appearance of a fairy-tale prince, and yes, Princeton holds its own by being one of the best universities in the nation. But in the end, Joffrey is God-awful and Princeton still pits their students against one another to compete over who is the best. What both King and Princeton need is a little taming. Quick, get Margaery Tyrell on the phone!
He never got to finish college because, well . . . you know why.