And for those who really know me, but were unaware of this little factoid about me until reading this: SURPRISE!!!
I was in love with Stephen Colbert when I was fifteen-years old!
Don't judge me! It was WAY before I knew of the existence of Bruno Mars!
But there was a reason behind my little crush on Colbert. Yes, I did think for a guy who was in his early 40's to be (not gonna lie) kinda good looking, but I also thought he was very charming on the show. And not to mention incredibly hilarious. There was just something about him that always brought me joy whenever I would come home after a long day at school. The highlight was to finish my dinner, do my homework and then sit in front of the TV and watch The Report. It was a nice little escape from reality.
But what really made me come downstairs to glue my eyes to the television set was the anticipation of: WHAT IS COLBERT GOING TO DO NEXT??? And let me tell you, Stephen never failed to make each show more exciting after the next.
To many, that might seem a bit ridiculous, but it truly saddened me to learn that The Colbert Report would be no more.
As my dad tried to put it to me, Stephen would still be around when he starts hosting David Letterman's The Late Show in 2015; it would just be his character who would be going away.
But that's exactly why this saddens me so much, goddamnit!
It was always his character that I would look forward to seeing on The Colbert Report!
His arrogant, fictionalized, well-intentioned, poorly informed, high-status persona who was always a self-important right-wing commentator, parodying cable news pundits!
That's who I'm going to be missing!!!
*To my foreign readers who are reading this and have no idea why I would feel such sympathy for someone as weird as this, trust me when I say, it's an American thing.*
#10: That Time Stephen Colbert Fought Both Jon Stewart and Conan O'Brien
#9: That Time President Obama Ordered Stephen Colbert To Shave His Head
#8: That Time Stephen Colbert Aired His Christmas Special
#7: That Time Stephen Colbert Was "Singing In Korean"
#6: That Time Stephen Colbert Opened a Super PAC
#5: That Time Stephen Colbert Ran For President . . . Twice
The second time was in 2012, when he tried to use his million-dollar-raising Super PAC to run for the presidency. But once again, Colbert never made it to the ballot. Though he did throw his support to Herman Cain, earning Cain a 1.1 percent of the primary vote – enough to help Cain surpass Rick Perry and Michele Bachmann. Watch Stephen Colbert on Meet The Press discuss his plans to run for president.
#4: That Time Stephen Colbert Testified Before Congress On Immigration
#3: That Time Stephen Colbert Danced To Daft Punk's "Get Lucky"
#2: That Time Stephen Colbert Made "Truthiness" A Real Word
#1: That Time Stephen Colbert Made Bears The Number One Threat To America
So I know that is not all of the amazing awesome things that Colbert has done on his show, but these were the top 10 that I could think of that really stuck with me since I began to watch the show.
Without a doubt, it's hard to say goodbye to The Colbert Repot – mostly because it'll mean saying goodbye to the ruthlessly ignorant, hilariously pompous, utterly indelible faux conservative pundit that the real Stephen Colbert has been playing on late-night TV for over a decade (counting his years also on The Daily Show).
Truly, after nine seasons and 1,447 episodes, Colbert finally attained television immortality on the wings of a song Thursday night
He is truly a character of the ages.
And so, in the worlds of Stephen Colbert: Good night, nation.