A College Senior's Inner Monologue When Becoming A College Senior

So, you're finally a senior.

How the hell did that happen? 

Weren't you a freshmen, like, yesterday?

If you suddenly find yourself, nostalgic, confused, sad, or are experiencing cap-and-gown-phobia, it's probably because you put together the fact that you're A MOTHER F**KING COLLEGE SENIOR!

Whoa! No need to get defensive!

Look, I understand that you are feeling ALL THE FEELS at the moment, and that you are ready to punch someone in the face if anyone says the "S" word to you. No need to freak out.

It's okay. It's all going to be okay.

Just take things slow and enjoy the year. 

Besides, it might be comforting to know that many other seniors in your grade share same exact thoughts as you. 

Don't believe me?
​
You'd be surprise.

The Shock That Dawns On You When You Realize That The Freshmen Are Now Juniors 

Wait? Weren't you a freshmen last time I saw you? Like, seriously, I'm not even kidding. I was a sophomore and you were a freshmen. HOW ARE YOU A JUNIOR?!?!?! That doesn't make any sense! You mean to tell me that you have one more year left at this college? I don't get another year after you! I get kicked out into the adult world! You should at least be a sophomore, not a f**king junior?! Explain to me how that happened!?

The Pain You Get When You Suddenly Find Yourself Saying, "This is my last . . ."

Welp, this is my last convocation.

Gee, I guess this is my last first day of classes.

Wow, this is my last Halloween college party.

God, this is also my last college football game.

HOLY CRAP! This is the last time I can ever dress up for The Rocky Horror Picture Show with my friends!

This can't be happening! This actually cannot be happening! 

The Thoughts You Have When You Write Up Your Senior Bucket List

All right, lets see here.

Go to a Harvard vs. Yale Football Game.

Ooo! Check out the county fair. That definitely needs to be added.

Meet up with my pals in New York City.

Go apple picking. I've always wanted to go apple picking.

Hmm, interesting. Why is this list so long? Did I seriously not take advantage of all the things that my college town had to offer me? I've been living here for, what, four years now, and not once did I ever muster up the energy to check out any of these amazing activities around me?

Either I've been putting everything off until the last minute, or I'm a world-class procrastinator. 

The Absolute Power You Feel When You Successfully Avoid Taking A Friday Class

(In God's Voice)

THAT'S RIGHT MOTHER F**KERS! BOW BEFORE THE GREATNESS OF MY SENIOR SCHEDULE!

IN IT'S DEVINE RIGHT, I POSSESS ALL THE FREEDOM OF SLEEPING IN AND WATCHING NETFLIX!

FURTHERMORE, UNLIKE YOU MORTAL BEINGS, I CAN GO OUT DRINKING ON THURSDAY NIGHTS!

ALAS, YOU WILL HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER YEAR BEFORE YOU CAN APPRECIATE THE GREATNESS OF THIRSTY THURSDAYS! TOO BAD YOU HAVE YOUR MATH AND/OR SCIENCE LAB ON FRIDAY MORNINGS. I'LL JUST BE OVER HERE SIPPING SOME GLORIOUS BLUE MOON FROM THE BOTTLE.

I F**KING LOVE THAT I HAVE NOTHING ON FRIDAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

The Stress You Encounter When You Have To Start Thinking About A Job After College

Job? Who said anything about a job? Am I suppose to start looking for a job right now? But I don't wanna a real job yet. Having a real job means that I have to have a real plan!

Oh my God! Do people think that I have a plan after I graduate from college! Is that a thing? Was I suppose to have a plan? Are they really that ignorant to think that I have a plan?

I'm not ready to search for a job. I'm fine just living on my parents income. Yeah, I guess I can do that. Oh, but that means sitting down and "talking" during dinner . . . WITH MY PARENTS! 

So yeah, maybe I am ready for a job. Oh yay! I guess I can get myself excited for a job.

I think. Maybe. Hopefully. Not really. 

The Insane Fantasies You Have When Planning Your Last Spring Break With Your Friends

Okay, here's the deal: We need to Spring Break the Sh*t out for our Senior Year!

Let's go to Cabo . . . no, Coachella! 

NO WAIT! Florida! We should go to Florida! We can be like those chicks in that Spring Breakers movie! Except we don't get arrested or run into James Franco.

We can ride mopeds, go to the beach . . . or, ride our mopeds on the beach!

I'm getting excited just thinking about it! We can go on a boat, swim with the dolphins or go cage diving and swim with the sharks!

HOW COOL WOULD THAT BE?!?! 

WHO IS WITH ME?!?!?!? 

The Inner Turmoil You Feel Whenever Someone Asks You What Your Post-Graduation Plans Are

MUST. NOT. PUNCH. FRIEND. IN. THE. FACE.

MUST. SMILE. 

MUST. SAY: "I. AM. EXPLORING. MY. OPTIONS."

MUST. NOT. PUNCH. 

MUST. NOT. PUNCH. IN. THE. FACE. 

MUST. SMILE. 

MUST. NOD. HEAD.

MUST. PRETEND. TO. KNOW. WHAT. YOU. ARE. DOING. 

The Prolonging Sadness You Feel Everyday When You Walk Around Your Campus

Wow, look at that tree.

Wow, look at that building.

Wow, look at that library.

So many memories happened on this campus. 

Do I have to leave it one day?

Can't I just stay here? Maybe a little longer?

It's such a beautiful campus.

It's such a nice campus.

I guess I should head to class.

​Don't wanna be late.

Essentially, when you become a college senior you get hit with so many emotions. Because you know that nine months from now you're be walking out of that college as a graduated adult.

And that very thought is absolutely terrifying.

Thankfully we, seniors, are still in the early stages where we haven't quite accepted the fact that we're graduating soon.

So, as much as we are all bittersweet over our senior year, I believe that this is a good opportunity to not press "fast-forward" on the remote control of our lives. Instead, I think that the general consensus would be to "pause." To appreciate all of the memories that you had on your college campus, as well as the memories you will make from now and until you walk across that stage to accept your diploma.

So heed this advice: We shouldn't be stuck in this "limbo" state worrying about what we're going to do after college. You only get one – and I mean ONE – chance to be a college senior IN YOUR LIFE so take advantage of ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING!!!

ENJOY IT!

After all, this time, next year, you won't be a college senior anymore.

Nope.

You'll be an Individual.