7 Books to Read In Order To (Somewhat) Survive Adulthood

A couple of weekends ago, I went back to my old stomping grounds at Mount Holyoke College for our Two Year Reunion.

Yeah, you read that right. 

My school has a TWO year reunion. 

Hey, we’re a really tiny school and we need to build that Alumnae network, that’s why.

Anyway, our Two Year Reunion was almost "too soon" for me. Not enough had happened, and everyone who I had reconnected with from my college days were all still pretty much in the same boat as I was. Everyone was JUST getting started with their lives. Some had immediately left to go back home after graduation to pursue entry level jobs, while others found tiny apartments in big cities while enrolling in graduate programs. 

In other words, we were still struggling adults. 
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Mount Holyoke offered everything a youngling like myself could want – academics, extracurriculars, good friends – and when I had left that campus I also left behind the bubble that was my identity as a college student. Unfortunately, there is no known cure for the deflated feeling one feels after leaving a campus like that. The feeling just persists beyond graduation.

​Because it's called adulthood.

Last year around this time, I was still a new adult struggling to adjust to my new environment. I was frantically trying to read as many books as I could in the hopes that something within these pages would tell me what to do next with my life. More so, I needed an escape. Since I couldn't pack up and go back to my old college dorm room at Pearson's Hall, getting out of my head was the next best option.

But even with all the book suggestions that came my way, I couldn't help but grimaced at the some of the "happy-go-lucky / feel-good" novels that were brought to my attention. I was an adult, and with adulthood comes confusion, overwhelming emotions, loneliness and a slight addiction to Netflix. I needed books that understood me, and felt EXACTLY what I was feeling.

So if you're a recently new adult, know that you are not alone. There are plenty of books out there that combat and even comfort the surprising or outrageously abnormal foreign feelings that (unfortunately) come attached with adulthood. Best of all, after reading these books you are reminded of a very important thing: 

The feeling you are currently feeling right now, is NEVER permanent.

#1: David Copperfield by Charles Dickens

Even in the 1850’s, things still sucked. Dickens’ classic about the still-relatable theme of overcoming awful circumstances to achieve great things is a reminder of the struggles we endure in our twenties. The story follows the life of David Copperfield from childhood to maturity as he accounts his ordeals working in his cruel stepfather’s warehouse, to his assumption into a middle-class society. But any happiness that touches Copperfield’s life is quickly taken away by sorrows before he can fully experience it. Yet Dickens conditions his readers to find happiness in every little thing Copperfield experiences, even if it is fleeting.  

#2: The House on Mango Street by Sandra Cisneros

Told through a series of nonlinear vignettes, Cisneros’ beautiful novel about a young Latina teenager growing up into a complex young woman, is sometimes heartbreaking and even sometimes joyous. The novel begins when Esperanza and the rest of her family move into a new house in the Latino section of Chicago. Meanwhile, Esperanza dreams of a life of creativity, independence, but more importantly about the woman she will become once she leaves Mango Street. Cisneros writes pointedly about the universal pangs of otherness and the growing pains of adjusting into adulthood.

#3: Adulting: How to Become a Grown-up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps by Kelly Williams Brown

Not a fiction book, but is definitely a book that everyone should read after graduating from college. Williams helps her peers navigate the rocky shoals of maturity to guide us twentysomethings who are just figuring out that food does not spontaneously manifest itself in the fridge overnight. Williams’ counsel doesn’t go unrecognized without a few personal and professional issues. From career advise (“Do not steal more than $3 worth of office supplies per quarter”) to cooking (“Oatmeal gives you an amazing amount of energy, like cocaine, if cocaine were really good for your digestion and didn’t ruin lives”). Adulting tackles multiple serious issues (468 issues to be exact) upon entering the scary adult world. But hey, at least Williams’ whimsical writing, makes the acclimatizing just a little bit more bearable.   

#4: Sweetbitter by Stephanie Danler 

Also known as “Adulting (for Beginners),” Danler’s bestselling nostalgic novel introduces 22-year-old Tess just as she arrives in the Big Apple. But like many fresh university graduates, Tess moves to New York without a plan and without any real clue about what she wants to do with her life. And like so many before and after her, she is ready to launch her adult life. She lands a high-end restaurant gig where she is invited to train and learn all about food, wine and service. Seems easy enough, right? Wrong. On her first day on the job, Tess discovers she’s in way over her head. She breaks plates and glasses, forgets to complete crucial tasks and accidentally puts herself in uncomfortable situations. Yet, Danler’s writing perfectly captures Tess' tumultuous twenties with rose-colored glasses. Just like Tess, everyone in their twenties has at some point moved to a new city or started a new job only to find themselves a little overwhelmed, while trying to find a place for themselves in the world. Yet there’s a gritty rawness to being new, a feeling that Danler can only describe as an homage to wistful youth.

#5: The Assistants by Camille Perri

In The Assistants, 30-year-old Tina Fontana works for media titan Robert Barlow. Tina dedicates herself to him, masters his schedule and earns his trust. But Tina also owes thousands in student loans, and she realizes that no matter how hard she works, earning $50k a year in Manhattan will never let her get out from under it. Her friends are in the same boat. They attended expensive colleges only to find themselves in a job market that has them running errands for the rich and famous. The temptation to reach for the money that their bosses spend on meals and jewelry is aggravating. Then when a technical error with Robert’s expense report presents Tina with the opportunity to pay off the entire balance of her loans, she questions whether to take the money, or to learn how to survive with her crushing debt.

#6: Modern Lovers by Emma Straub

Longtime husband and wife, Elizabeth and Andrew, and their good friends, Zoe and her wife, Jane are trying to sort out their relationships. But eons ago, when Elizabeth, Andrew and Zoe were at Oberlin, they were in a band together. Their fourth band member, Lydia went on to fame and adulation and an early death at 27. This news causes both Elizabeth (who wrote the hit song that made Lydia’s career) and Andrew (who seemed to have a complicated, possibly romantic relationship with Lydia) to re-evaluate the arc of their lives. What’s most satisfying about Modern Lovers is how it captures the lives of its characters, young and old with equal authenticity. It is a novel about the rough transition from youth to adulthood and the need to remember, reimagine and reassess. 

#7: Rich and Pretty by Rumaan Alam

Sarah and Lauren have been best friends since high school, through college, love, jobs and the harsh realities of adult life. Lauren works as an associate editor for a publisher of cookbooks, is single and pursues a carefree, on-the-go lifestyle. In other words, Lauren doesn’t settle. Sarah, the daughter of retired singer and a former advisor to the president leads a charmed life. For Sarah, her biggest fear is that her socialite parents won't approve of her engagement to Dan. But now Sarah and Lauren have been apart for so long. Can two women who now rarely see one another still call themselves best friends? After all, each woman envies and is horrified by particular aspects of the other’s life. Alam explores how the attachments we form in childhood shift as we adapt to our adult lives and how the bonds of friendship endure even when paths diverge.

Thankfully, returning to Mount Holyoke's campus also put into perspective the things I didn't really miss about college (i.e. 8:30 AM classes, the communal bathrooms, the tedious homework assignments, etc.) and gave me a small appreciation of what I already had now that I was (somewhat) adulting.

Better yet, the people who I had reconnected with at my college reunion – people who I was really good friends with – were telling me about their interesting adventure while going through adulthood. One friend of mine who I had always liked – mainly because she said hello to everyone she passed on campus, and was always sincere – I was really happy to see again. She told me about her new job, moving to a new city and about a boy she was now dating. 

And honestly, I felt really good for her. She genuinely made reunion worth it. 

Because sometimes it's worth listening to both the success and struggles of navigating the cutthroat waters of adulthood.

After all, there's no instruction manual on how to live out or lives. 

We just have to try and live out the best of it.